Before we say anything about the unfortunate outcome of the Stanley Cup Final...
2009 CALDER CUP CHAMPIONS
CONGRATULATIONS HERSHEY BEARS
(and neuvy and karl. because we love you)
and Congrats to Neuvy who won the Jack A. Butterfield Trophy which is the most valuable player. 16-6. 4 shutouts.
B-E-A-R-S
BEARS BEARS BEARS
Well congratulations to Pittsburgh and Detriot. It was a great series. Unfortunately the buggers won which makes us upset. But it really was a great series.
Too bad.
PREGAME
So what in the heckers was up with the fake coach thing? I mean I can sort of stand when they sit there during intermission and pretend to be the coaches. At their desk.
But they were actually in the empty locker rooms and were giving speeches to nobody. Mike Milbury was Mike Babcock and Pierre was Dan Bylsma.
Really? That was a bit too cheesy. As in freaking Kraft macaroni and cheese. Yea that cheesy.
But for the record, we liked Mike's better. Ya know why?
He isn't Pierre.
So apparently the Pens are all wearing "The pen's in your hand" t-shirts underneath their padding. Which really cracks me up.
Reminds me of a nine year old girls' soccer team with their matching pink polka dot hair ribbons. They match their outfit and everything.
THAT'S SO CUTE.
So right before the game they show this commercial
And it really does give me chills every time I see it.
PERIOD 1
Zetterberg wins a clean faceoff against Cindy. Fans go wild. Wow it is loud in there.
Cleary beats Gonch to an icing and it is waved off which begins a Red Wings frenzy and a really intense shift. Hank had a rebound opportunity but there was no angle...but yea that shift made the crowd go even more wild.
OH HOT DAMN Darren Helm hit Bobby Scuds hard against the end boards. The camera was right there too so it was, as Joe B. would say, right in my living room.
Snap Maltby stole it from behind Flower and started up some more nice pressure in the Pens' zone.
Datsyuk had a great backhand shot but I think he should have gone in a little farther, maybe gotten a better angle. But then again, the Pens' D was pushing them all outside so I guess it was better off that way.
INSIDE THE GLASS WITH PIERRE. YAY.
Okay obviously Pitt is losing the races to the puck and losing the battles for it. It's kind of obvious since at the time the Wings were raping them along the boards and behind their net.
K thanks for finally getting us back to the game. Bye.
Nice defensive positioning by Malks. It's not a wonder why he got the Conn Smythe. But anyways he just was forcing Lebda to the outside and blocked the shot.
Muhammad Ali is there in a Red Wings jersey. That's nice that all the players are tapping their sticks...he got a good round of applause. yay :)
Hank almost had a tap in goal from Datsyuk and Helm had a good shot from around the top of the circle.
Well those were some pretty fancy fakes by President Kennedy...Ericsson blocked a JStaal shot from like two inches away. Bet that one stung. So then Helm gives Ozzy the puck via his right skate that was a bit scary.
Okay one of the announcers keeps referring to Brett Lebda as "the Notre Dame product" like it's his other last name. I think we get the picture.
COMMERCIAL BREAK
NEW TRANSFORMERS MOVIE TRAILER.
IT LOOKS AMAZING.
TOO BAD WE CAN'T GO SEE IT WITH KARL AND NEUVY AND VARLY.
Now back to your regularly scheduled programming.
I am not a fan of these middle of the game interviews with the coaches by Pierre. Why doesn't somebody say something? It has to be annoying. Just saying.
Wow dangerous dump in by Filppula. Flower was juggling that one. Really weird bounce. Damn.
So Kronwall completely leveled somebody in the neutral zone. Blew them to smitherines.
Well duh Brad Stuart what the heck kind of defensive play was that. My four year old sister could make that slashing call. In her sleep.
On the PK Ozzy "wanded" the puck out of the air. He's magical like that. Nice stick by Cleary to clear it (hehe cleary...clear) and Kronwall then completely levels Cindy and the crowd freaks out.
I don't like how I can see Cindy's lip stubble in HD it kinda makes me barf.
That was great. Helm lost his helmet and Doc goes HELM IS.....HELMETLESS!!!!
Mr. President had another fancy move to get a shot off around his defender.
FILPPULA HAD AN AMAZING CHANCE. FANCY MOVES OH MY GOSH
Detroit would have a lot more goals right now if they stopped skating past the net, next to the net, behind the net...they need to stop. Right in front of it. Plant themselves there. And bang in the garbage goals.
Talbot fed it to Geno who didn't get a shot off but then later Max had a chance himself but Ozzy totally ROBBED him.
So after the first period the shots were 10-6 penguins which kind of surprised me.
Oh and apparently Mario is being knighted by the Order of Quebec.
Sir Lemieux.
Fun stuff.
Moving on to
PERIOD 2
Was that dump in not an icing? Or is that just me. I may be wrong but i think that dump in right before Max's goal was an icing.
Talbot gets the puck off of Stuart's turnover off of Malk's skate and went 5-hole. Poor Ozzy.
1-0 Pens
Coincidental minors for JStaal and Holmstrom. Which I don't get the call on JStaal but I will take it anyways cause that means it's not a power play.
Ozzy makes a great stop on Matthew Cookie who then plows over him.
Then...my favourite part of the game...Cindy and Johan are racing to the puck when Johan proceeds to hip check him into the boards a.k.a. give him a piggy back ride resulting in the injury of his privates. Cindy totally was given special treatment by the refs everyone saw that holding. We were sure he wouldn't be back in the game but, lo and behold, he did take like two shifts in the third period. Whatever.
YAY ANOTHER INSIDE THE GLASS WITH PIERRE MY FAVOURITE OMG YAYYYY I'M HAPPY THIS MAKES ME FULL OF JOY I TOTALLY DON'T WANT TO WALK OFF A CLIFF WOOHOOOOO
Ugh where was the defense there they totally left Ozzy out to dry on that 2-on-1. He was a bit off his angle but whoever that one Red Wing was I can't remember who but he didn't get anywhere near Max Talbot.
2-0 Pens. I'm getting worried.
After HELMetless had a nice hit on Geno where he totally didn't leave his feet beforehand, Maxime gave him the stink eye. I am going to try to find a picture somewhere. Hopefully.
That could have been a goal it was a high shot but Cleary was in front of Flower and was practicing his cheer moves and was working on his toe touch and knocked it out of the air. Definitely not the time, Dan.
That is one of Lidstrom's biggest strengths is getting a shot through. But, again, there is nobody in front of the net to bang in the rebound after Flower gets lucky with a save. Juicy juice rebounds but nobody is there.
PERIOD 3
WHAT. CINDY IS BACK. WHAT. WHAT. WHAT ABOUT HIS INJURED PRIVATE PARTS. THEY MAY BE SMALL BUT THAT'S ONE SENSITIVE INJURY.
Most obvious trip of my life. Even though it was embellished a bit. Shhhh.....
Another power play where nobody is in front of the net. All these chances and nobody is there for those juicy rebounds.
Orpik upends Datsyuk that was kind of awkward he like gave him a quick bear hug and then dropped him. Okay then.
They are showing the Stanley Cup being polished. But after that I didn't take a lot of notes I was too busy pulling my hair out again.
BEAUTIFUL SHOT
2-1 Pens. Okay we are still in this, boys.
Again, I'm not taking many notes at this point I totally forgot about them. But Filppula did get a nice pass and had a great chance to charge the net with somebody behind him but chose to stop and was forced to take a bad shot from the top outside.
Oh and Ozzy had a brilliant stop on Malks it was a freaking bullet.
Ew and there was an extreme close up shot of Maxime wiping his nose with his jersey. ATTRACTIVE.
Of course I miss the best chance ever it went off the crossbar. My dog had to pee right as the game was getting the most intense. Of course. Ugh dumb crossbar. As a lax goalie, I tend to absolutely love the bars of the cage but when watching hockey I usually absolutely HATE it. It's the most aggrevating thing ever. I mean Flower was totally beat it went off of JStaal and over his shoulder. Wow was that annoying.
Nice now Flower is wiping his nose during an extreme close up shot. Thanks, NBC. There is nothing else I would rather be watching.
end of the game. pens win it 2-1.
I love how Flower puts his hat on. Hair flip then puts it on backwards. Why yes he is a pimp.
A pimp we can't understand. And who has really big teeth.
Mike Babcock shook Cindy's hand and said "Great leadership by you" but what he really meant was WOW YOU WHINE TOO MUCH DO YOU NEED A PACIFIER? OK WELL SEE YOU NEXT SEASON. Maybe he will have his period by then. OMG!
GENO WON THE CONN SMYTHE. OF COURSE HE WOULD. But it's a little bit ok since..well..I mean look at him. CUTIEEE PIEEEE <333333 yay you're adorable. But we're still barfing. Since your team just won.
The entire time Cindy was holding the cup I was thinking drop it drop it drop it. Unfortunately he only went WOOOO WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE and his voice cracked a lot.
BEST WARRIER CALL
It was a tie.
JStaal.
I mean he was crowing THE entire time. Really loudly and in such a high octave I don't think men are supposed to be able to scream at.
Sykora.
WE FUCKING WON
enough. said.
P.S. The final Pierre count was about 30. But probably more.
2009 CALDER CUP CHAMPIONS
CONGRATULATIONS HERSHEY BEARS
(and neuvy and karl. because we love you)
and Congrats to Neuvy who won the Jack A. Butterfield Trophy which is the most valuable player. 16-6. 4 shutouts.
B-E-A-R-S
BEARS BEARS BEARS
Well congratulations to Pittsburgh and Detriot. It was a great series. Unfortunately the buggers won which makes us upset. But it really was a great series.
Too bad.
PREGAME
So what in the heckers was up with the fake coach thing? I mean I can sort of stand when they sit there during intermission and pretend to be the coaches. At their desk.
But they were actually in the empty locker rooms and were giving speeches to nobody. Mike Milbury was Mike Babcock and Pierre was Dan Bylsma.
Really? That was a bit too cheesy. As in freaking Kraft macaroni and cheese. Yea that cheesy.
But for the record, we liked Mike's better. Ya know why?
He isn't Pierre.
So apparently the Pens are all wearing "The pen's in your hand" t-shirts underneath their padding. Which really cracks me up.
Reminds me of a nine year old girls' soccer team with their matching pink polka dot hair ribbons. They match their outfit and everything.
THAT'S SO CUTE.
So right before the game they show this commercial
And it really does give me chills every time I see it.
PERIOD 1
Zetterberg wins a clean faceoff against Cindy. Fans go wild. Wow it is loud in there.
Cleary beats Gonch to an icing and it is waved off which begins a Red Wings frenzy and a really intense shift. Hank had a rebound opportunity but there was no angle...but yea that shift made the crowd go even more wild.
OH HOT DAMN Darren Helm hit Bobby Scuds hard against the end boards. The camera was right there too so it was, as Joe B. would say, right in my living room.
Snap Maltby stole it from behind Flower and started up some more nice pressure in the Pens' zone.
Datsyuk had a great backhand shot but I think he should have gone in a little farther, maybe gotten a better angle. But then again, the Pens' D was pushing them all outside so I guess it was better off that way.
INSIDE THE GLASS WITH PIERRE. YAY.
Okay obviously Pitt is losing the races to the puck and losing the battles for it. It's kind of obvious since at the time the Wings were raping them along the boards and behind their net.
K thanks for finally getting us back to the game. Bye.
Nice defensive positioning by Malks. It's not a wonder why he got the Conn Smythe. But anyways he just was forcing Lebda to the outside and blocked the shot.
Muhammad Ali is there in a Red Wings jersey. That's nice that all the players are tapping their sticks...he got a good round of applause. yay :)
Hank almost had a tap in goal from Datsyuk and Helm had a good shot from around the top of the circle.
Well those were some pretty fancy fakes by President Kennedy...Ericsson blocked a JStaal shot from like two inches away. Bet that one stung. So then Helm gives Ozzy the puck via his right skate that was a bit scary.
Okay one of the announcers keeps referring to Brett Lebda as "the Notre Dame product" like it's his other last name. I think we get the picture.
COMMERCIAL BREAK
NEW TRANSFORMERS MOVIE TRAILER.
IT LOOKS AMAZING.
TOO BAD WE CAN'T GO SEE IT WITH KARL AND NEUVY AND VARLY.
Now back to your regularly scheduled programming.
I am not a fan of these middle of the game interviews with the coaches by Pierre. Why doesn't somebody say something? It has to be annoying. Just saying.
Wow dangerous dump in by Filppula. Flower was juggling that one. Really weird bounce. Damn.
So Kronwall completely leveled somebody in the neutral zone. Blew them to smitherines.
Well duh Brad Stuart what the heck kind of defensive play was that. My four year old sister could make that slashing call. In her sleep.
On the PK Ozzy "wanded" the puck out of the air. He's magical like that. Nice stick by Cleary to clear it (hehe cleary...clear) and Kronwall then completely levels Cindy and the crowd freaks out.
I don't like how I can see Cindy's lip stubble in HD it kinda makes me barf.
That was great. Helm lost his helmet and Doc goes HELM IS.....HELMETLESS!!!!
Mr. President had another fancy move to get a shot off around his defender.
FILPPULA HAD AN AMAZING CHANCE. FANCY MOVES OH MY GOSH
Detroit would have a lot more goals right now if they stopped skating past the net, next to the net, behind the net...they need to stop. Right in front of it. Plant themselves there. And bang in the garbage goals.
Talbot fed it to Geno who didn't get a shot off but then later Max had a chance himself but Ozzy totally ROBBED him.
So after the first period the shots were 10-6 penguins which kind of surprised me.
Oh and apparently Mario is being knighted by the Order of Quebec.
Sir Lemieux.
Fun stuff.
Moving on to
PERIOD 2
Was that dump in not an icing? Or is that just me. I may be wrong but i think that dump in right before Max's goal was an icing.
Talbot gets the puck off of Stuart's turnover off of Malk's skate and went 5-hole. Poor Ozzy.
1-0 Pens
Coincidental minors for JStaal and Holmstrom. Which I don't get the call on JStaal but I will take it anyways cause that means it's not a power play.
Ozzy makes a great stop on Matthew Cookie who then plows over him.
Then...my favourite part of the game...Cindy and Johan are racing to the puck when Johan proceeds to hip check him into the boards a.k.a. give him a piggy back ride resulting in the injury of his privates. Cindy totally was given special treatment by the refs everyone saw that holding. We were sure he wouldn't be back in the game but, lo and behold, he did take like two shifts in the third period. Whatever.
YAY ANOTHER INSIDE THE GLASS WITH PIERRE MY FAVOURITE OMG YAYYYY I'M HAPPY THIS MAKES ME FULL OF JOY I TOTALLY DON'T WANT TO WALK OFF A CLIFF WOOHOOOOO
Ugh where was the defense there they totally left Ozzy out to dry on that 2-on-1. He was a bit off his angle but whoever that one Red Wing was I can't remember who but he didn't get anywhere near Max Talbot.
2-0 Pens. I'm getting worried.
After HELMetless had a nice hit on Geno where he totally didn't leave his feet beforehand, Maxime gave him the stink eye. I am going to try to find a picture somewhere. Hopefully.
That could have been a goal it was a high shot but Cleary was in front of Flower and was practicing his cheer moves and was working on his toe touch and knocked it out of the air. Definitely not the time, Dan.
That is one of Lidstrom's biggest strengths is getting a shot through. But, again, there is nobody in front of the net to bang in the rebound after Flower gets lucky with a save. Juicy juice rebounds but nobody is there.
PERIOD 3
WHAT. CINDY IS BACK. WHAT. WHAT. WHAT ABOUT HIS INJURED PRIVATE PARTS. THEY MAY BE SMALL BUT THAT'S ONE SENSITIVE INJURY.
Most obvious trip of my life. Even though it was embellished a bit. Shhhh.....
Another power play where nobody is in front of the net. All these chances and nobody is there for those juicy rebounds.
Orpik upends Datsyuk that was kind of awkward he like gave him a quick bear hug and then dropped him. Okay then.
They are showing the Stanley Cup being polished. But after that I didn't take a lot of notes I was too busy pulling my hair out again.
BEAUTIFUL SHOT
2-1 Pens. Okay we are still in this, boys.
Again, I'm not taking many notes at this point I totally forgot about them. But Filppula did get a nice pass and had a great chance to charge the net with somebody behind him but chose to stop and was forced to take a bad shot from the top outside.
Oh and Ozzy had a brilliant stop on Malks it was a freaking bullet.
Ew and there was an extreme close up shot of Maxime wiping his nose with his jersey. ATTRACTIVE.
Of course I miss the best chance ever it went off the crossbar. My dog had to pee right as the game was getting the most intense. Of course. Ugh dumb crossbar. As a lax goalie, I tend to absolutely love the bars of the cage but when watching hockey I usually absolutely HATE it. It's the most aggrevating thing ever. I mean Flower was totally beat it went off of JStaal and over his shoulder. Wow was that annoying.
Nice now Flower is wiping his nose during an extreme close up shot. Thanks, NBC. There is nothing else I would rather be watching.
end of the game. pens win it 2-1.
I love how Flower puts his hat on. Hair flip then puts it on backwards. Why yes he is a pimp.
A pimp we can't understand. And who has really big teeth.
Mike Babcock shook Cindy's hand and said "Great leadership by you" but what he really meant was WOW YOU WHINE TOO MUCH DO YOU NEED A PACIFIER? OK WELL SEE YOU NEXT SEASON. Maybe he will have his period by then. OMG!
GENO WON THE CONN SMYTHE. OF COURSE HE WOULD. But it's a little bit ok since..well..I mean look at him. CUTIEEE PIEEEE <333333 yay you're adorable. But we're still barfing. Since your team just won.
The entire time Cindy was holding the cup I was thinking drop it drop it drop it. Unfortunately he only went WOOOO WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE and his voice cracked a lot.
BEST WARRIER CALL
It was a tie.
JStaal.
I mean he was crowing THE entire time. Really loudly and in such a high octave I don't think men are supposed to be able to scream at.
Sykora.
WE FUCKING WON
enough. said.
P.S. The final Pierre count was about 30. But probably more.
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